Never Let Me Go

The beginning of Never Let Me Go is so serene that you get the feeling of suddenly coming down a huge roller coaster slope when you find out what’s really going on. I remember putting down the book after finishing it and just sitting in silence, thinking about the parallel world in Hailsman.

Dreams and Hopes 

“We all complete. Maybe none of us really understand what we’ve lived through, or feel we’ve had enough time.”

The kids in Hailsham live through their short lives in a trance—never understood their meanings or had any control over them. I’m not sure if this is what the author wants us to take away, but this quote really speaks to me about living it up. Kathy and her crew are not allowed to have dreams or hopes, their lives are too short to do so and their purposes were predetermined. In reality, we have the freedom to choose our passion. But our time is still limited. So if you want to do something, or take a risk, just go for it.

Identity

“We took away your art because we thought it would reveal your souls. Or to put it more finely, we did it to prove you had souls at all.”

This quote sends chills down my spine. We often struggle with our own identities. Everyone tells you to be yourself, but, especially as a young adult, it’s not that easy to know who you really are. Kathy and her crew are not just in search of “who” they are but “what” they are.

The Fault in Our Stars

I’ve been waiting for until I’ve seen the film to write the book review. Finally did!

I love that the title of the book comes from a Shakespearean quote. John Green’s straightforward humor makes me chuckle and shudder a little bit at the same time. I believe that staying strong and optimistic is for the best. That’s why a little part of me collapsed when the cheerful and vigorous Augustus, lost all control and dignity, cursed his life helplessly and desperately in the parking lot.

This is not just a love story. It challenges the concept of being alive as well as the society’s glorfication of fighting a battle with cancer. My heart felt like a suddenly deflated balloon when Hazel said to Augustus, “Even cancer isn’t a bad guy really: Cancer just wants to be alive.” So whose fault is it? It’s got to be somebody’s, right? Peter Van Houten, the harsh man who mostly only said horrifying and disturbing things, wasright when he said, “…Never was Shakespeare more wrong than when he had Cassius note, ‘The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars/But in ourselves.’” Sometimes there is no bad guy but fate. This realization makes you feel utterly powerless, but eventually it makes you strong because you realize that there’s really no other choice. We are all dealt a random hand of cards. The only option is to play the best game.

“You don’t get to choose if you get hurt in this world…but you do have some say in who hurts you. I like my choices.”

I pictured Augustus, half-conscious and having the last bit of life squeezed out of him, scribbling down his final thoughts in his eulogy for Hazel. Although heart-wrenching, it’s comforting to know that he was content with the final chapter of his life. He was right. No one can walk the earth without getting hurt. Sometimes it’s worth it because it makes you feel alive. I guess that’s what we should aim for—to make decisions so we can eventually say, “I like my choices.”

Thinking, Fast and Slow

“Nothing in life is as important as you think it is, while you are thinking about it”

Concise, witty, and thought-provoking. This quote represents the style of the book quite well!

I took me a while to finish this highly acclaimed book. I had to constantly put it down and think about how it links to my own actions. I would recommend everybody to read it. It challenges the way you think! Kahneman introduces many psychological phenomena that undermine our daily judgments without us noticing. Here are some of my favorite ones (probably because I’ve fallen for all of them):

“System 1” vs. “System 2”

Our brains operate in two separate systems. System 1 is fast, instinctive and emotional; “System 2” is slower, more intentional, and more rational. Unfortunately, we are more likely to think with “System 1” since it takes less effort. Ultimately we need to remind ourselves to stop being lazy, and think more than what our “intuition” tells us.

Loss Aversion

People prefer avoiding losses to acquiring gains. As a simple example in the book, people are more upset about losing $100 than happy about gaining $100. This is because of the endowment effect–people value a good that they own more than an identical good that they do not own.

Personally, this probably explains why my house used to be full of stuff that I got from random places. Let it be an old CD player, a dress that’s too big, or a bottle of lotion with a scent that I no longer liked—once I own an item, it becomes infinitely more valuable, and I wouldn’t throw it away even though it had no use. But luckily, the past 4 years of constantly moving around made me better at avoid the endowment effect—I realize that not many things are worth the effort of packing and dragging them to new apartments.

Loss aversion also explains why people have a hard time letting the past go. People hold onto memories because they fear that the future might not be as great. But this is only because they put too much value in the state they are currently in.

The Book Thief

The Book Thief is one of my favorite books. It tells a story that takes place in Nazi Germany, a period that’s really not that far from us yet seems that way. The book starts with Liesel’s seemingly peaceful new life, and gradually builds up as the plot twists and turns, and finally ends in a poignant and saddening climax.

Liesel is a brave girl despite her timidity at times. She steals book from the most dangerous place and runs into a Jews parade to look for Max. Liesel is an epitome of so many other lives ruined by the unfortunate time. Despite all the pain in her young life, she never gave up her love for learning. One thing I’m disappointed about her is the way she treated Rudy. I wish she could’ve kissed him at least once before he died, or show some affection instead of being the stubborn girl.

Rudy, “the boy whose hair remained the color of lemons forever,” is the most innocent victim in the novel and also my favorite character. He’s a boy that would paint his face black because he wants to be like Jessie Owens, and stand in freezing water for minutes just to get a kiss from the girl he loves. Rudy’s relationship with Liesel is such typical young love—they fight, argue, yet deeply care about each other. All Rudy wanted is a kiss, but he never pushed too hard. Maybe he thought he would have more time than he actually did. I believe Liesel did love him. But in a time like this, there’s so much fear in the air and so little place for love.

The Great Gatsby

I have very mixed emotions about the Great Gatsby. Gatsby, in my opinion, is a tragic hero. His dream was set up for failures. People and things change as time goes by, whether you like it or not. Like C.S. Lewis once said, “isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back, everything is different?” I don’t think Gatsby would’ve agreed with this quote. Remember when he cried, “Can’t repeat the past?…Why of course you can!”?
As for Daisy, she didn’t intentionally want to hurt anyone, She’s a girl who didn’t know what she wanted and chose to live a safe and conventional life. Maybe she’s what she hoped her daughter would be, “a beautiful little fool”, but is it really “the best thing a girl can be in this world”?

“Whenever you feel like criticizing any one,” he told me, “just remember that all the people in this world haven’t had the advantages that you’ve had.”

Having spent the last four years at Berkeley and soon working in the Financial District, it’s sometimes easy to forget how privileged I am. But when I take a step back and look at my life from outside of my daily bubble, I can’t help but think, yes the world isn’t fair, but I have no right to complain anyway cause I’ve pretty much lucked out!

“So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.”

I’m totally on board with the idea that life is too short to live in the past. But sometimes it’s inevitable to fall back into memories. Human beings continually change as every passing moment gets integrated into their lives and becomes a part of who they are. In a sense every moment is a defining moment. The deal with Gatsby is that he stopped moving forward while the world around him is.

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly

This tragic memoir is not for the faint of heart. Journalist Jean-Dominique Bauby tells a poignant story of his life before and after a massive stroke. I could not believe how it was written! Blinking 200,000 times over 10 months while the transcriber repeatedly recited the French alphabet. Can you imagine?

“The memory of that event has only just come back to me, now doubly painful: regret for a vanished past and, above all, remorse for lost opportunities. Mithra-Grandchamp is the women we were unable to love, the chances we failed to seize, the moments of happiness we allowed to drift away. Today it seems to me that my whole life was nothing but a string of those small near misses: a race whose result we know beforehand but in which we fail to bet on the winner.”

This sounds like a common regret of people on their deathbeds. Nothing haunts you like the things you could’ve said or done. While I’m all for seizing the moment, this quote reminds of what Morrie from Tuesdays with Morrie said: forgive yourself. Don’t beat yourself up for chances you’ve missed or things you could’ve been. At the end of the day, make peace with others and forgive yourself too.

“Today is Father’s Day. Until my stroke, we had felt no need to fit this made-up holiday into our emotional calendar. But today we spend the whole of the symbolic day together, affirming that even a rough sketch, a shadow, a tiny fragment of a dad is still a dad.”

I love this quote. I used to tell people that I’m not a fan of all the made-up holidays, that it just a commercial tool. Sounds a bit cynical, doesn’t it? Now I see these them as reminders of the important people and things we have in our lives. Let it be Mother’s Day, Valentine’s Day, or National Chocolate Day. No need to complain; rise and celebrate woohoo!